Last night my husband encouraged me to get out of the house, so I went to see a movie called Letters to Juliet. I went by myself, which I do not mind at all (I get to see whatever I want, no one whispering to me during the movie, and I don't get embarrassed about tears on my cheeks). I thought it was going to be a tear-jerker because I'm pretty sure I cried during the trailer some months ago. But no. I guess it's more of a romance-comedy than a drama.

But this isn't really a movie review. Well if you want to know, I enjoyed the movie, it was very light-hearted, romantic, sweet, and I think the leading lady Amanda Seyfried is adorable. It was also very predictable. The thing I hate about sappy love stories is that it reminds me that although my husband is a wonderful companion for me, he is lacking in the romance and spontaneity department. There are, of course, more important things in a relationship.


Anyway, ITALY! It begins in Verona and moves to Sienna. I was drooling over the Italian countryside in this movie. How can I be so in love with a country that I've barely been to? (I spent one day in San Remo when I was 16). It's been my dream to go to Italy since I was a teenager. I'm completely infatuated with it. I will go see a movie simply based on the fact that it takes place in Italy. When I studied art history in college, my favorite sections were on Italian art (is it just me, or were all the best artists born Italian?). If Italian language was offered at my high school, I would have studied it there, but I had to wait till college, and I loved it much better than French and Spanish. If my college had a study abroad program in Italy, I probably would have gone (I was SO jealous that my best friend went with her school). Any book I read or photograph I see that relates to Italy makes me want to go there. My husband and I were going to go before we had children, but super-practical him changed his mind and wanted to save up for a house instead. We acquired said house and I'm decorating the lower story Tuscan-style. Can I please go to Italy and see it all for myself??


I want to go and eat, and look at art and architecture. I want to eat and see the countryside. I want to eat and listen to people ramble in the the most beautiful language in the world. I want to ride a gondola in Venice (I hear it's overrated, but I don't care!) I want to have a snack on the Spanish Steps in Rome, write in my journal as I observe the pigeons in Sienna's Central Square, and be in awe over the destruction of Pompeii. I want to go to Naples and taste the best pizza in the world! (Did I mention I want to eat?)


I always thought I might enjoy it more with a companion, but now I think waiting was a bad idea. Not that I ever had any money to go before (I've always been bad about that). Oh, well, one day. It's on my to do list.

Have you ever had anyone delete a comment you left on their blog? Did you feel insulted, or did you laugh or brush it off? This happened to me today, and I feel a mix of feelings about it. First, I felt insulted that she would just close off the conversation like that. I was going to leave another comment to sort of 'soften' my previous comment a bit, as it was a little on the spirited side, but when I saw she had deleted it, I was just going to brush it off. Then I felt bad, that perhaps I had insulted her and she just couldn't handle it. And the truth of it is, I know this person to be rather judgmental but also easily offended. And she's my sister-in-law.

Yeah.

In her post she was sort of bragging about how her three boys all go to bed on their own at 7pm and don't wake till 7am. Okay, that's fine, she can brag if she wants. Then she went on to talk about another mother who couldn't get her six-year-old down before nine, and she said the mother shouldn't make a big deal about it--that she is the parent and should act like it. I thought that was a little judgmental. Then she put in parentheses that the mother was 'crazy.' Okay, that sounded really judgmental. Then she said that a six-year-old should be in bed by 7. By then I was thinking, What the heck? Who is she to dictate who should be in bed by when? Then I took a breath, and told myself that she is allowed to think that children should be in bed early. But then she said she thought it was the saddest thing to see a little kid in the grocery store at 9:00 at night. That was it, that was the final straw. I had to say something.

I don't think I was mean. I simply related a few stories, including my own, of how later bedtimes work better for some children and their families. I pointed out that in some cultures the children go to bed at the same time as the parents and said I didn't think they were sleep deprived. I validated her point that children need a good night's rest, but said that what worked for her family doesn't work for everybody. I wasn't snarky or anything.

I either told her she can't expect others to do what she does, or that she can't judge their situation, or both. Since she erased it I can't go back and check.

Then, at the very end of my long comment, I asked, genuinely, if she knew of any studies that supported early bedtimes as being healthier for children. I'm interested in the whole sleep issue, and I wanted to know. I'm afraid she might not have interpreted it as being a genuine question, though.

I'm a sensitive person, and this whole deleted comment thing just ruined my day. I found myself feeling stressed and snapping at my son. I decided to leave another comment after all, simply stating that I was sorry for telling her not to judge because I know it sucks to be told what to do. And it's true. I could have written that whole comment much better if I hadn't had so much emotion behind it. I don't believe there is anything wrong with writing emotionally, but in this case, I may have been able to reach her better if I had written it differently. I could have said the same things, but in a gentler way. Like I said, I wasn't mean or snarky or anything, but I could have used a little more sensitivity. People can be rather sensitive when you disagree with them.

What do you, my friends, think about this? Do you just write whatever you feel like, or have you learned the art of saying what you mean, but in a sensitive way? What if it's a family member you are dealing with? I try to stay on good terms with my family, but this woman is always saying things that make my head spin. I've already had to swallow my pride once to smooth things over with her, but I don't know how much of her I can take. Argh.

Anyway, thanks for listening. I needed to get this off my chest.

*UPDATE*
I went back to the post to see her response to my apology and she said she had no idea what I was talking about. She says she never saw my comment. I was sick over this issue for nothing! On the one hand, I'm glad I didn't offend her, but on the other hand, I didn't get to express my opinion to her. She's bugged me more than once on the sleep issue and this seemed like the perfect opportunity to 'enlighten' her. lol Oh, well. She really isn't the sort to be open to ideas different than hers anyway.

The quality of my life seems to be improving since the New Year. I attribute it in part to my New Year's resolutions, and also in part to this blog. I haven't written nearly as much here as I thought I would. I think I needed the permission to write uncensored more than to actually do it. In fact, shortly after I decided to launch The Wooded Hill, I felt like I didn't need blogging anymore (but still wanted it). But writing here, without fear, seems to have freed me somehow. I worry a lot less about what I write on my other blog. I feel as though I've matured a bit, too.

Some things have changed with me, again, partly to do with my resolutions. I'm eating better (much less comfort-feeding, and more well-balanced meals), I'm more active, and the pain that resided in my ankle for over a year suddenly decided to leave (after some dietary changes and a small adjustment by my chiropractor). I've learned that dairy is a no-no, except on occasion, and that fish oil supplements are very good for me. Zinc did amazing things for me, but then it was making me a bit constipated, so I stopped taking it. So far, everything is still okay, but if I get out of whack again, I'm trying the zinc again.

I haven't had a meltdown in a while. I cried the other day, but I didn't flip out. I feel like I am in control of myself. It feels wonderful. Of course, I've been getting lots of fresh air and sunshine, too. Honestly, I've been doing lots of little things that all contribute to better health and well-being. For me, it's always been a great juggling act: As long as I'm juggling enough of the 'feel-good things' then I do well, but if I start getting lazy and drop one here and one there, then the next thing I know I'm a mess again.

Spiritually, I'm doing better, but not as well as I would like. I decided to read the Bible all the way through. I don't read every day, but I'm plodding along. Still in Genesis. I normally read The Book of Mormon for my spiritual feeding, which is much easier to understand, but despite my incomprehension of most of Genesis, it still strengthens me somehow. I also joined the church choir, and I had forgotten how wonderful it was to sing with a group.

I've been trying to pay attention to the moon phases and actually know if the moon is waxing or waning, which is an accomplishment for me. I'm paying more attention to my menses and trying to make it a positive experience but being honest with myself when I think it sucks. I don't feel like I've made a lot of progress there, but that's okay. I expect it to take a while to change something that's been going a certain way for so many years.

I feel like I need to spend less time in the blog world. I love it so much, but too much time here takes away from other things, and I probably need to give my brain some space to breathe, instead of constantly filling it with other people's opinions and experiences. It's become such a habit for me that it's hard to break. But I could use the time to work on projects, read books, do something creative, or heck, even clean my house. I really want a clean house right now and have been considering using my son's nap time to accomplish that. But in order to do that I really need to be willing to let go of some of my computer time. It's. So. Hard.

So, that's where I am. Mostly good stuff, yay! Oh, and I just bought a new paintbrush set. If I can get away from my computer some more, maybe I will have some new creations to share!

x

I let my 22 month old son come into my creative space after his nap. He found the paints and a paint brush and said "I paint it." I've tried doing the painting thing with him twice before--the first time he tried to eat the paint (he was a little over a year old). The second time, a few months later, we tried finger paint, and he quickly lost interest. It had been a while, I thought maybe he would be more into it. I put a small dollop of blue, yellow, orange and green into the palette, and gave him purple construction paper. Even though it only lasted all of 5 minutes, I thought it turned out pretty:



There was some leftover paint in the palette, though, and I couldn't let it go to waste. I grabbed a sheet of paper that was headed for the recycling bin and decided to throw some paint around on it. It's really nothing, it's not pretty or particularly creative--it was just an experiment. I feel so new to painting...I'm just trying to see what paint does.



I think my toddler's abstract is way prettier. :)